User blog:CaveJohnson333/Cave's Critiques: Epic Rap Battles of Horror Season 3
ejoiejoajoijeowjojawfjwoplsletmeintomyzone-tanjiejeafoeajfoae Today we have the sp00py series by Mr. The Flatwoods Monster AKA ProbablyNoah make sure ur wearing ur brown pants his took fucking FOREVER to write, why tf did u have to have 20 goddamn battles flats ;~; xoxo luv u bby <3 =Slender Man vs Jeff the Killer= Dis is da premiere of Season 3 of ERBoH, and boy is that an original idea u got dere flats crappyposta vs creppypesta sp00ks galore Flow: well flats hasn’t fixed the beat yet, so i had no beat to work with (thanks flats)but hot daaaaaaaamn sick rhyme schemes and flow all around. 9/10 (Jeff had best flow) Disses/References: Damn, we got some heavy hitters here, I mean that brother line, that taken off the wiki line, daaaaaamn. 9/10 (Slender Man had best disses/references) Jeff Best Line: I’ll do the honors and slaughter your followers whose lives aren’t even worth twenty dollars! (because lol) Slender Man Best Line: Let the darkness overwhelm you, and reunite you with your brother… (OHHHHHHHHHHHHH) Overall: Great premiere, fantastic battle, superb disses and flow (and a gr8 beet! fix it flats >:C) 9/10 Winner: Slender Man =Norman Bates vs Alex DeLarge II= O SHIT AS IF REVIEWING HIS SERIES WASN’T ENOUGH, MIT’S BACK AGAIN WRITING AS DELARGE YA BOIIIIIIIII Flow: Another missing beat (FLATS >:C) but gud flow, some nice rhyme schemes, nothing too special 8/10 (Alex had best flow) Disses/Referemces: A slight downgrade from last battle, but still some decent disses/references. 7.5/10 (Alex had best disses/references) Overall: A decent battle, but nothing tooooooooo special. 8/10 Best Norman Line: That I won't cut him slack, like they cut the cheesy movies ending Best Alex Line: It was right sickening to make fun of your crossdressing hobby, naughty naughty, Winner: Alex DeLarge =Krampus vs Gingerdead Man= o man sp00ky kristmas speshul jingel hells batgirl smells it’s switching pages here so filler space Flow: O hot damn almost as hawt as da Gingerdead Man’s dough, tho Krampus was off near the beginning rest is gud 8.5/10 (GD Man had best flow) Disses/references: ooooooooo shit, krampus was hard in dis battle, almost as hard as my co...al. GD man was aight too 9/10 (Krampus had best disses) Overall: Gud Kristmas spashul, and gr8 battle 9/10 Best Krampus line: and ban this boob tube bandit, I’m worldwide, no one can beat Krampus! Best GD Man lines: I’ve decked the halls with your balls! Catch me if you can, bitch! Winner: Krampus =Pale Man vs the Rake= O man i bet this battle left u PALE with fear?!?! OHOHOHOHOH Flow: Awwwwww shit man, I think this is the best flow so far, both rappers were on point fam 10/10 (the Rake had best flow) Disses/References: Rake went so fukin hard, but Pale Man didn’t hold back either 9/10 Overall: this battle is yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee af, definete reccomendation 9.5/10 PM best line: Silence, bitch! Your ever growing mouth is full of shit! the Rake best line: Leave you scarred for being the worst labyrinth dweller since the Minotaur! Winner: the Rake =Invisible Man vs Midnight Man= Here’s an idea I haven’t SEEN before?!?!?!!? OHOHOHOHOHHOHO Flow: IM flowed on point man, tho his first 4 lines were weird for me to read, but MM’s first few lines were really weird, but other than that, gud flow 8.5/10 Disses/References: This battle had some yeeeeeeeeeeee disses and some hawt references, but MM’s intro felt a little bland to me 8.5/10 Overall: A gr8 battle, but nothing too special 8.5/10 IM’s best line: You must be trippin if you expect to defeat Jack Griffin, MM’s best line: You’re blowing it, can’t flow to this, it’s 1 AM and I’m closing in… Winner: Invisible Man =The Skin Taker vs Buffalo Bill= oman this battle was hammy like a lamby! (i’m running out of puns) more filler space Flow: o fuuuuuuuuuuuuuk flow was smoother than buffalo bill’s lotion, i mean hot damn, BB was hawt af 10.5 (o:)/10 (BB had best flow) Disses/References: There was quite a lot of good references considering how much material ST really has, both went pretty hard, and ST was good even if he didn’t start talking like a pirate until like halfway through 9/10 (BB had best disses) Overall: Amazing battle, though something about the way it’s written kinda rubs (huehuehuehe) me the wrong way. 9.5/10 BB’s best line: Leave a bitching babbling bag of bones broken and buried! ST’s best line: Think you’re a formidable foe? You’re not even in the T.V. Show! Winner: Buffalo Bill =Sweeney Todd vs Edward Scissorhands= mfw i almost started reading EJ vs the Blinded and then was all “owait have to actually review ST vs ES” Flow: Fuk, both rappers flowed pretty dam well, but i think ES was just a liiiiiiiiiiiittle bit better 9.5/10 (ES had best flow) Disses/References: Man, ik it’s a rap battle, but they didn’t have to get so snippy with each other OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO ok but ya both rappers went fukin hard but i think Sweeney had better disses/references 9.5/10 (ST had better disses/references) Overall: Hawt af battle (not just cuz it had johnny depp c;) but nothing too special 9.5/10 ES’s best line: As this uncommonly gentle man disses the probably mental man ST’s best line: Hate to get mean, but you’re the emo version of Wolverine Winner: Sweeney Todd =Eyeless Jack vs The Blinded= here we have foomus cropypoosta the Blinded vs obscure video game heroine Eyeless Jack woohoo Flow:o o o o we may have best flow so far, rhyme scheme was on fukin point m8 10.5/10 (EJ had best flow) Disses/References: both went fukin ham, but Blinded was just killer m8 10/10 (the Blinded had best flow) Overall: fukin amazing battle, definite reccomendation, superb 10/10 EJ’s best lines: First 4 lines of his second verse the Blinded’s best line:“Eyeless Jack has been removed from this battle cause the Blinded said so” Winner: the Blinded filler space blah blah sunset shimmer senpai notice me <3 =Mary Lou Maloney vs Shrignold= awwwww,valentines special, how sweeeeeeet Flow: i think i fukd up first time going and read too slow, but the flow in this was yeeeeeeeeeeee 9/10 (Shrignold had best flow) Disses/References: Like Skin Taker, I’m surprised how many good disses and references there was considering how unknown Mary Lou is. 9/10 (Mary Lou had best disses/references) Overall: Gr8 Valentine special, gud battle, Harry or Henry or wahtever the fuk his name is was kinda meh tho Shrignold best line: You could change your name, clean your brain, you’d still be owned! Mary Lou best line: The rest? Please, can’t best me - But testing me? Hmph! Pesky Bee! Harry Warden best line: When my hot disses burn Shrignold harder than they burned his God Winner: Mary Lou (mfw one of 3 people who thought she won) > Shrignold > > Harry Warden =Killer Klowns vs Twisty the Clone= another missing beat, flats u gotta stop clownin around with these beats i swer ;c Flow: KK were hawt af with their flow, but Twisty was kinda ehhhhhhhh 8/10 (KK had best flow) Disses/References: well ik jack shit on both but both went pretty hard, even tho Twisty’s last line was kinda anticlimatic 8/10 (KK had best disses/references) Overall: Decent battle, but Twisty made it kinda meh 8/10 KK best line: So go running back to CarnEvil, and get Outer my Space! Twisty best line: Because I’ll be bringing down saucers like it’s the Roswell Incident Winner: Killer Klowns =Authors vs Directors= here’s a hawt and original idea i might steel for my series (xoxo flats sorry not sorry) Flow: Flow was gud in this, beats didn’t really transition too well, but eh. it was prob tough editing them together 8.5/10 (Authors had best flow, specifically Stine) Disses/References: o my death jokes abound but also gud death jokes, so yeeeeeeeeee 9/10 (Directors had best disses/references, specifically Hitchcock) Overall: Great mid season finale, and amazing battle, definitely read this one if you haven’t 9/10 Stoker best line: That the Last Days of Alfred Hitchcock were once again ended by a “Stroke”-r! Hitchcock best line: The hardest thing slamming Ireland since the potato famine Lovecraft best line: You’re a pest, I’m Herbert West! You can’t Murder! this! Craven best line: Meet the next Nightmare from Elm Street! Do you like Scary Movies? Stine best line: But this is no Beast from the East! This dino Came From Ohio! Burton best line: See these? I produce Big Adventures worth way more then you Pee-Wees! Winner: Authors (Stine > Stoker > > Lovecraft) (for directors, Hitchcock > Burton > > Craven) =Leprechaun vs Rumpelstiltskin= ooooo fuk im a lil tipsy saint patty day speshul let go Flow: O FUK LEBRECHAUN FLOW WAS TOO HAWT FOR ME also Rumpel was pretty gud too 10/10 (Leprechaun had best flow) Disses/References: Leprechaun went hard and Rumpel wasn’t 2 shabby either (Lepre-can’t lolol) 9/10 (Leprechaun had best disses/references) Overall: Spectacular special, and amazing battle read this battle pls 9.5/10 Leprechaun best line: My raps are flawless! Your flow falls flatter than your box office! Rumpelstiltskin best line: I’m going wild, speak again and I’ll silence another whiny child Winner: Leprechaun =SCP-173 vs Weeping Angels= don’t blink, u stink. take a drink, i like pink! Flow: more of this shitty shadowville beat shit that won’t work for me, so flow is prob better than i say it is. BUt flow was yeeeeeeeeeeee for Weeping Angels, gr8 for SCP, and kinda eh for FNAF 8.5/10 (WA had best flow) Disses/References: Weeping Angels went hard af, but FNAF and SCP were pretty gud too 8/10 (WA had best Disses/References) Overall: A decent battle, but nothing too special 8/10 WA best line:Defeating SCPs with expertise. Hold it there, you three, freeze! (i just like how this sounds) filler space blah SCP best line:A grinning demon just made the Weeping Angel’s names come true FNAF best line:We’ve got you Puppets on the strings, the Cybermen couldn’t S-A-V-E-T-H-E-M Winner: Weeping Angels =Godzilla vs King Kong= this was originally off season (AND U CAN TELL LOLOLOOLOLOL jk xoxo) Flow: both had sxc flow, but i gotta say Godzilla STOMPED (OHOHOHOHOH) 9/10 (Godzilla had best flow) Disses/References: Both went pretty hard (Godzilla going so hard he killed Kong lel) and were pretty hawt wit der disses 9/10 (Godzilla had best disses/references) Overall: A great battle, but kinda forgettable, nice story tho. 9/10 Godzilla best line RUN! It's Godzilla coming in to let loose Atomic raps in this song! King Kong best line: I’ll turn any M.U.T.O to toast, and then clip that moth’s wings, Winner Godzilla =HABIT vs the Bunnyman= a bunny suits u well the way u hop around town playing show and tell Flow: the beat is lmao, and the flow was tight dawg 8.5/10 (Bunnyman had best flow) Disses/References: both were pretty gud with disses and references, nothing too special 8/10 (Habit had best disses/references) Overall: Gr8 easter special, decent battle, nothing to write home about 8.5/10 Bunnyman best line: Trying to face this D.C. MC? You’ll be needing lots of therapy! HABIT best line:Took the fall against this rabbit head and now he’s been inHABITed! Winner: Bunnyman =Dipper and Mabel vs Billy and Mandy= ofuk this battle is gr8 Flow: Fucking perfect 11/10 (B&M had best flow) Disses/References: Amazing 11/10 (D&M had best disses/references) Overall: Fucking perfect battle 11/10 Best B&M line:Meanwhile, fanfictions ruined you faster than any Gremoblin ever could! Best D&M line:Your rhymes don't hit hard at all! But hey, your aim is getting better! Best Grim line:I’m bisecting isosceles monstrosities like it’s Geometry class Best Bill line:yourself to Eris! But how can you stop me? When you N O L O N G E R E X I S T ? Winner: Tie (o:) =BEN Drowned vs HAL 9000= your move creep, like inspector gadget told ya Flow: smooooooooooooth as buttery butterly butter butter butt er butt i’m tired 9.5/10 Disses/References: ooooooo oooooo HAL was 2 brutal, but ben was ye 2 9/10 Overall: Gr8 battle m8, fantastic, superb, dingle pringle 9/10 Best BEN line:Now it’s YOURTURN, and SHO-Damn! Killed by his only loved one Best HAL line: And I was brought to life to defeat you. Hello World. Goodbye Ben. Winner: HAL 9000 =Sinister vs Insidious= ok flats, now insidious 3 and sinister 2 are things when is sinister vs insidious 2 Flow: smooth like cream cheese on a bagel huehueuehuhuebu (i stole that from the battle :c) 9/10 (Dalton had best flow) Disses/References: yeah great disses and references both went hard blahblahblah 9/10 (Dalton had best disses/references) Overall: Great battle, reccommend it, needs sequel tho ;c 9/10 Best Dalton line:Dalton’s jumpin’ into the fray! And Ashley here wants to play? Best Ashley line:Haven’t seen you in three years. Don’t worry, I’ll make you famous again Best Bagul line:Lip-stick’s a dimwit. Start with your shit and I’ll leave you flipped! Best L-S D line:I’m Insidious! You’re hideous! You don’t know what kind of props at stake! Winner: Dalton and LS-D =Rod Serling vs the Crypt Keeper= dragon Flow: CK was yeeeeeee liked the repetition in his first 2 lines, and Rod had a nice calmnesss about him, like Bob Ross. 9/10 (CK had best flow) Disses/References: listen i’m going to level with you i’m tired af, both were great 9/10 (Rod had best floimeandisses/references) Overall: Great battle 9/10 you know what fuck this shit i’m going to bed, you get the last bits tomorrow fgts Category:Blog posts